The Letter and Documents of Complaints regarding the way Lolli & I were treated by the Hospital that have been haunting me for MONTHS are finally coming together

I've been trying to write them - finish them - for MONTHS. Since the  BEGINNING, it's been horrible... But then it ESCALATED BADLY from 1st December 2022 onward.

And I got SEVERELY Traumatised by what happened that day and from what followed on from it.

The Complications didn't end with the incidents themselves, though. As SERIOUS things tend to do, this also had SEVERE, COMPLICATED CONSEQUENCES.

MORE Problems, MORE Complications, MORE Ramifications ... No Matter What, they kept turning up, bringing it all BACK AGAIN, Creating MORE and MORE things to have to ADD to the Reports that I was writing -- About what COST these things came with, and continued to DEMAND...

To be Honest, this STARTED 31st October 2022... It is STILL ONGOING... (!!!)

And it will take a LONG TIME MORE for the FALLOUT and RAMIFICATIONS may finally come to an end...
Or Maybe They Never Will.

It's been a LONG Five Months... The Suffering has been SEVERE for EVERYONE in this Family Household. I don't think we will truly Recover from it -- I think it's CAUSED RAMIFICATIONS either Directly Because Of - OR, At the VERY LEAST -- Brought Certain Things FORWARD. 

If I WAS Going To Get Worse from Long COVID... Well, that Came A LOT Faster because of this. I am in FULL BURNOUT and I have NO Idea if that's Ever Going To Change Now. I am as bad as I was when I had Sepsis in 2018. But I was FIVE YEARS Younger then, and I was barely recuperating from That when Long - Fucking- COVID hit me right in the Gut with a Javelin through my face. It's been a complicated Five Years Hence, I'm not sure if my body has it in its capability to come back from COMPLETE DEVASTATION again.

Even before then, I was recovering from the Physical & Mental Trauma of a Full Nervous Breakdown having RELENTLESS & DANGEROUS Levels of PAIN from the Fibromyalgia, and forced away from London to live with my parents within Snowdonia, North Wales. This was followed by EIGHT Months of RELENTLESS Damaging Raging Storms from November 2015 onwards. ALL this Culimated Horrifically inside me, Resulting in an EXTREME manner... I was reduced to the physical and mental ability of a young toddler. No Kidding. And I spent the next Four Years trying to come back to myself from this Complete Retardation of my formerly sharp and successful Autistic Mind. 

Now, will all that, I have to live with, fight through, the Entirety of them. After Going Through The Entirety Of Them. Over The Past TEN Years.

If Lolli WAS Going to get any worse, it's expedited that by YEARS... She's trying to SLOWLY Recover from what happened to her health and how the Hospital Just Made It WORSE. TWICE.... She is Bedbound. Doubly Incontinent (and the promise of a referral by the Hospital Consultant to the Incontinence Nurse back in December never materialised, either). Too weak to walk. Struggles to stay awake from SHEER EXHAUSTION. After RELENTLESSLY Vomiting All Day Every Day For Literally Months... She ended up with EXTREME & SEVERE VERTIGO. The Vomiting Started In November. The Vertigo started the End of December. Vomiting Ended in FEBRUARY... and she's only started eating properly in MARCH. Her Vertigo is still being treated in a slowly-but-surely manner with medication. One thing is for certain -- she isn't going to be very well any time soon. 

aND - Success...! MARATHON PACKAGE is COMPLETE...!

AFTER  ALL THIS TIME.... It's finally fucking gone!!!!

​I HAVE JUST FINISHED THE THREE DOSSIERS AND EMAIL LETTER for PALS regarding WHAT HAPPENED with Lolli - and me... ALL OF US... Mam's had to sit right here with me to make sure I stay on it... She had to keep  bringing me round from Flashback Hallucinations, and in at least THREE Cases, I was about a breath away from FULL BlackOut, too, no less...

I am SO FUCKING DRAINED & EXHAUSTED &.... DRAINED... Head feels like it's been MEGA bashed in ... But at the same time I also feel a lot... Better.... (?)


Funnily enough now - I can literally FEEL the concrete Walls going UP AND AROUND this SHIT inside my head, WALLING IT UP behind a STEEL BANK-SAFE DOOR in my "Mind Palace" .... Literally Getting LOCKED AWAY behind Concrete Blocks and Foot-Thick Steel Walls and Door, Away from my Consciousness and Soul-Destroying Pain ...

I can only hope completing and SENDING IT will bring some measure of comfort or healing. Because I Literally CAN'T TAKE the Torment of the Trauma that's living inside my head... The Flashbacks, The Fear & TERROR, or The Overwhelming EVERYTHING that makes me want to -SCREAM AND SCREAM AND SCREAM inside my head FOREVER....