Chronic Illnesses, Chronic Pain, Medical Conditions... Just literally anything that's permanently Wrong... The Weather -- including The Heat -- Makes Shit Worse.
Mine's Fibromyalgia & Paresthesia, Hemiplegic & Vestibular Migraines and Von Willebrand's Disease.
The Heat right now is utterly destroying.... And I was already a fickle enough thing before anything was severely Wrong. London Summers used to leave me feeling Quite Wrecked. Don't even get me started at the 3 weeks I spent in Thailand, only to live inside my hotel room with the air con for most of it(!!).
It's made Everything HARDER…
And that's Not Good.
It's B.A.D Enough as it is.
The Fibroplegia as a whole is going Stupid Supernova... and it's not really Stopping. I haven't been this bad since the Sepsis... over FIVE Years Ago. I'd worked Dammed HARD to get to where I was before the December Debacle. But now, there's really nothing left to show for it...
Another Complication Of The Heat Is Being Unable To Drink Much … And I mean Anything. No Coffee, No Water. And I already can't really drink anything else (thank you Fibro). Fibro Flareup mean it’s literally not possible, and that’s caused by the hardass Heat... Hot Heat, which means I need to drink…
Because Dehydration is making the Fibro Worse... And Catch-22 Clusterfuck much…??!
Therefore... Here We Are. The Inevitable.
I'm Now Bypassing Everything I've Got In Me, Instead Of Going Through The Catheter Now... There is Nothing Going Into My Leg Bag. I changed it and everything to try and make this work... so probably wasted a bag, as well...
The Heat and Lack of (or rather Literally Unable To Do ANY) Drinking has probably Blocked It -- And Would Flush It.... but no one (Medical) has actually signed me up for flushes or OK'd anyone actually doing them.
The Likelihood is I might be in for another long night, because the Nurses are going to have to turn up tomorrow to fix it...
I LITERALLY JUST DID THIS WITH LOLLI YESTERDAY. JUST. WHY?!
It's Also Affecting Anything I Want To Do That Doesn't Involve Staring At A Wall... I Just Wanted To Sort A Small Bit Of Section that's under my little floor desk, where my Gaming Keyboard resides. Just That. Nothing Complicated.
Except, it wasn't Complicated that ended up being the problem. It was Exhaustion -- Very Plain; Very Simple.
It was only a few days ago… On 3rd June – We worked on JUST One Small Section of Under The Desk... It ended up being a long hour and a half.
Found a shocking amount of out-of-date stock of things, and things dating back with BBEs in 2021!🫣 Absolutely goes to show how ill I've been that things have been left languishing at least that long. It was Equally Disturbing to think it had been SO Long, because time had been standing still and rushing at the same time, throughout the whole COVID-era, especially after Lolli and I caught it -- and got what is almost undoubtedly Long COVID to go with it.
I PAID For This Effort BADLY -- starting even as I was actually Doing It, about an hour in… I was Wrecked.... I AM [STILL] Wrecked... Nauseatingly Painful & Wearying migraine-like headache, TOO TIRED & FAGTIGUED.... EVERY Movement is Agony, Breathless - like the air is thin and not enough o it, Have to take all focus, Willpower and courage to move by now; to do Anything....
And On Top Of It ALL... It's TOO GODS-DAMNED HOT...(!)
VERY Unfortunately I had to Go To The Bathroom afterwards, too...
Going to the bathroom was MEGA HARD Before… Now……… JEEZY CRAP It's TORTUROUS.(!) I BLACKED OUT within about 10 minutes of being there – then came around Half An Hour after that – only to, of course, having to face ACTUALLY LEAVING…
Struggling with leaving bathroom, struggling with More Make-Spasms, Struggling with Blackouts, Struggling With Exhaustion, Struggling With Moving , Struggling With Pain..... Struggling. BIG TIME.
Struggling with BlackOuts and Struggling with the Heat... Which is also helping to Cause The BlackOuts.
… Was also Struggling Greatly to manage to take 10:30pm Meds…
Then… Struggling to sort out Night Things that should have been done around 10:30pm...... Instead I collapsed about 11pm and was Blacked Out, two or three more times... I Got Hurt this time, cos I collapsed in a heap by the side of the bed...
Journey Journal Entry
The Next Day… Worse… Breathless and Dizzy, Zoned Out, Lightheaded... From MOVING. I Got Out Of BED. Helped a LITTLE with Cleaning Lolli. Talked a LITTLE BIT to Lolli... And I feel like I've Run A Marathon I am SO FUCKING WRECKED AND DRAINED AND DONE.
Done nothing but get out of bed before that.
The Day after I did this little clear out… I PAID.
Frankly, I AM STILL PAYING…
I am SO very Confused and Can't Think Straight... I am in Distress and in PAIN .... TOO HOT... CONFUSED...
Feels like my entire body (that I can feel) is fizzing with Popping Candy... it's a really awful sensation; Just goes through me... And Breathless, like halfway up to Everest Peak...
I'm SO Drained... I don't even know what to do with myself... Just... Done.... Now.
I am so Exhausted, I'm ZONING OUT... I STILL Still Feel like I'm Just Always BREATHLESS (like too-high-up-a-mountain minor hypoxia)...
I took x2 Flixotide and 2x Ventolin, and it's helped clear up my airways to be able to breath almost well again – Breathing went down to 94% before. Got it Up To 97% at least.
DEFINITELY -- THIS HOT WEATHER HAS
A LOT TO ANSWER FOR...
(WAY too much…!!!!!!!!!)
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