A Suprapubic Catheter is an open hole in the abdominal wall large enough for the tube of a catheter to go through. It's a basic, small surgery that takes an hour or less. Some Doctors were totally AGAINST it [for no good reason]. #
BUT - Frankly - it changed my life for the BETTER - IMMENSELY.
I have a Suprapubic Catheter because I had a... Complicated... Relationship with my Urethral Catheter -- To Say The Least.
These Things SEEM Scary... But They're Not REALLY, Once You Get Used To It... Sort of...
It's Literally Just Me -- I don't like to think about it. I don't really want to, Truly - BUT.... I am creeped out by it, because ... . There Is An Actual PERMANENT HOLE in my Body. Opened up with a scalpel and designed to Stay Open. That really freaks me out, when I think about it.
I am Terrified by it, because it takes minutes for it to close back up. It's a PERMANENTLY REQUIRED OPEN WOUND in your body, and your body WILL Heal it as soon as the tube is removed.
Just Theory? Hah! No -- It happens. It HAPPENED. And after the first 6 weeks of having the FIRST One Put In, the Damned BALLOON in the Tube FAILED. Deflated - Gods know how that saline fluid got out, but it did. I Didn't Know what had happened... Until it was too late.
The Hole Was CLOSED.
I tried rushing to A&E to see if they could Fix It, but to No Avail. They wanted to first tell me to stay in and they'd squeeze me into their day's list the next day... Bless them! But -- I had Von Willebrand's Disease.
...Incidentally, it's the ONLY blood clotting disorder (and a sister condition to Haemophillia) that females CAN have. It's RARE. So, Guess Who Got It. At least it's mildest Type: Type 1 [even "borderline" level], so at least I don't have to do anything special about it --except have an IV of a drug called DDAVP to support Clotting (or IV TXA if I've been REALLY Good at keeping it stable-ish) when undergoing surgery /tooth extraction. And THAT's Why They Said No. Or, More Like -- "Not. On. Your. Fucking. LIFE ... Literally"; not verbatim, but definitrely more than implied...(!!)]
Because of that, I wasn't allowed anywhere near a theatre room or a scalpel until Haematology had been through everything with a fine tooth comb and had my precious DDAVP IV ready to go beforehand. As soon as I mentioned the condition, the light went off in the Doctor's head -- he'd been part of the [original] surgery team, and immediately remembered me. So... I had to be sent home. With a Urethral Catheter... To keep going through the Same Shit Every Gods-Damned Day Again, until a NEW Surgery Date could be organised.
I got Six Weeks of reprieve, till it all came cascading BACK around my ears again. SIX FREAING WEEKS... And BACK to Square One AGAIN.
Shit Kept On Happening, Though.... [!!!!!!!] ....
It wasn't long after -- days, or maybe a couple of weeks Max -- SECOND Lockdown happened. [STUPID COVID. STUPID!!!!!]
In their favour, the Urology Team rushed me back in as soon as possible after Lockdown Lifted. They stuffed me in the first place they could manage.
It was Two Months [almost to the day] after the last one had come out.
They offered Yule Solstice Day of 2020... Which gave me mixed feelings. Yule Solstice was to be celebrated at Home with chocolate Yule Logs and Gifts... Not in in Hospital with surgery. On the other hand... This seemed more like a Gift, so I decided I was going to view it that way.
There have been ZERO issues with it since then --- With Time of Writing Being Over 2 years 3 months later.
It changed my life, immeidately, and all for the better. It's a NO Fucking BRAINER.
...Apart from the fact you have to get your head around having a Literal Actual Open Hole in your body. Forever & Always... Swings & RoundB
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